Showing posts with label CSULB. Show all posts
Showing posts with label CSULB. Show all posts

Thursday, January 21, 2010

Anyone Can Teach!

That's right! Anyone. Well, that's what it seems like if you're staff at California State University Long Beach. Sure, at one point this state funded (are any schools in California really state funded at the moment?) university may have had its moments. But even when Richard Carpenter funded the Richard and Karen Carpenter Performing Arts Center, he was wise in not including any remnants of the university's name in the building's obscenely long title.

California State Budget cuts are ruining my educational experience. Any class that doesn't meet enrollment requirements are instantly cut one day after posting if minimum class enrollment isn't met, so teachers are creating classes that draw in the masses instead of focusing on educational value.

Exhibit A:

I enrolled in a German cinema class this semester. Though the title sounds intriguing and possibly suggests a fascinating history full of rich background information, it's just a fancy phrasing for showing up for a Wednesday night movie club where we watch some lady's Netflix queue who believes her "passion for movies" qualifies her to extract meaning. She may have had some credibility had she actually studied film, not bought enough movie tickets to equal film school tuition, and she'd be even more credible if she had achieved her Ph.D. by now instead of putting off her dissertation for the past few years in order to pursue her other passion: posing for her webcam showing an array of bored facial expressions which she posts to her Facebook almost constantly. Maybe she can teach a class on photography in the fall.

Budget cuts and decrease in salaries have also led to an increased orneriness in the staff. Maybe some time ago education and thriving, diverse departments used to be a key goal of the university, but remnants of those happy days of yore are harder to find than the Holy Grail. Instead, students have been reduced to mere numbers and are one budget cut away from having our student I.D. numbers tattooed on our foreheads and patches identifying our areas of study sewed onto our shirts.

In fact, in order to KEEP students at the university, it has become widely accepted by administration, staff, and faculty to resort to belittling students until there is no self-identity left, from which they are able to mold us into the model beings they want: emotionless, passionless robots who care about nothing other than earning the school money and will bend over to take the abuse.

Why stay in a program in which department chairs continue to belittle its students and thrive off of becoming leaches that suck the life and drive out of every being it can? Because graduate credits don't transfer, I'm so close to being done, and I still care about what I'm studying: German language. Sure, the department is suffering so much it has practically disintegrated by allowing students in who cannot formulate one simple sentence in German. And yes, those same students are receiving the exact same credit for doing all of their work in English whilst I continually strive to better myself and improve my foreign language skills, but who will come out the better man? Certainly not the crabby, old German department chair who sends out mass e-mails every-other week to remind students he is the one with a Ph.D. and depreciating mind who has sold his soul for the ability to sit in an office all day and use his socialist scare tactics to verbally bash all students into submission and feel like he is a superior being, when in reality it is the students who remain intact in spirit that shall overcome in the end and who will, without a word spoken, become the superiors.

Monday, January 18, 2010

2010!

Well, it's the new year. Or rather, it has been for the past 18 days. What have I learned from this past year? For one thing, that I'm not very great at blogging. I mean, really: 23 entries in the past 4 or so months? Tsk tsk tsk on myself.

I begin teaching next week at a new university. I'm not really nervous as much as I am appalled at myself for agreeing to teach at a public university. Not that there'e anything wrong with it *cough*state budget*cough*, but I'll miss being able to xerox materials without having to sacrifice my paycheck or possibly a baby.

What's more is that I'm not really enthused about teaching this semester as I was last semester. Sure, I'll do it because it's an easier way to earn money than when I prostituted for the bank, but do I really have the energy to drag myself to campus before noon on Tuesdays and Thursdays? Not really.

But that could just be the weather talking right now. It started pouring buckets of rain today, and California is expected to get about 60" ... of rain, that is. Who expects it? Me. I didn't even crawl out of bed until sometime between 4 and 5P.M. today because I just didn't have the energy to expend.

Update with pictures to come soon!

Wednesday, September 9, 2009

Schiller Me Timbers!

Dear California State School System,

Thank you very much for your generous furlough days that allowed for my classmates and myself to meet at 50-something-year-old man at a cheap motel for an endless supply of red wine and beer, as we discussed Friedrich Schiller's "Kabale und Liebe" without the direction of a professor.

I remember pulling into the parking lot and feeling like call girl as I entered, stumbling about the hallways looking for the correct room, but I don't remember how many glasses of wine I had. When a British Dr. from Oxford tells you to "drink up!" you don't ask any questions. Instead, you let the wine flow.

Now, I've seen Oprah's Book Club many-o-times on television, so I was prepared on how these gatherings operate, but not even Oprah could prepare me for how much alcohol I'd consume. At first, I thought the wine would make me a little less tense, since I wasn't primed on the topic (I may just have put off reading this play all together), so I had a glass. Then another. Then another. Then another. Then another. Then another. Then another. Then another. Then another. Then another.

It was only the first five minutes, and I was Lucy Ricardo doing the Vitameatavegemin shoot in a room full of Frasier Cranes (only these Frasiers weren't as ironically funny or witty as Kelsey Grammar). It comes as no surprise that German scholars aren't known for their humor (Germans, in general, aren't known for their humor), so hardly anyone was amused at my stumbling about and loud shuffling of papers, or even when I announced to our whole group that I had to use the restroom, but eventually the conference ended, and I was free to drive recklessly home.

Many people may be against these furlough foreclosures, but I say as long as there is free alcohol a-flowin', school's not worth a-goin'! Keep up the good work, California Educational System! Let's beat this budget crisis with a cocktail in both hands.

Yours Truly,
Brandon